don't cheese grater your floor popsicle

Tonight's lesson is not to ever wear a shopping cart full of green sweaters when there are going to be a much bigger unrealistically sized shopping cart of people in your house. Especially when some of them are in Halloween costumes. My costume tonight was "green sweater crazy and freaking out man." Sufjan Stevens is calming me down a bit now...too bad I don't have him in a bottle like those ships in a bottle, so they would have had to build the bottle around Sufjan Stevens, but now he's in there and intact....maybe we could even give him a ship to sail while he was stuck in there and bored. Sailling on a heart shaped watermelon in a sea of broccoli colored, asparagus covered beans.

nuggets from the past...

So, tonight I've been doing a little hard drive cleaning and i came across one of our archival plans... i'm glad we make these..

P.S. i have no fucking idea when we did this...

The Plan...
by Tyler and Peter

Objectives (decided first)
1. pete tongues the pen (15?)
2. make the fire us will...
3. levon sells cartoon balloons...
4. call friends to hear answering machines...
5. write a movie...
6. include this plan and much dialogue in the movie...
7. call bart farkus...
8. defeat mephisto, the commies, and the moops...
9. listen to weird old records...
10. razorface, ooh, amazin grace...!
11. ride bikes
12. buy, sell, ingest, transport, deal, and eventually be arrested for posession of... well... something...
13. author a bill which changes the legal spelling of the word banana to banaña... maybe even bañaña.
14. watch a movie, possibly the one we watch...
51. go ape
62. whip it good
73.2.end objectives
PLAN OF ACTION
LIKE THE SONG ABOUT SAMSON FROM MIDDLE SCHOOL CHURCH CHOIR
YOU KNOW, THE ONE THAT SAM MISSAL WAS OBSESSED WITH THAT WENT LIKE, “SOMETIMES I’M SAMSON, WITH THE STRENGTH TO CONQUER ANYTHING....”

Wesn’s, in the year 2002, will will (yeah, that’s right gerkass) (yeah, i bloody well know that jerk isn’t spelled with a g) commence the activities needed to carry out objective #4, upon receiving a negative result from objective 4 we will will continue by making sweet love to a gerbil of my choosing, this shall henceforth be referred to as objective #cl4236, and shall be done quietly and stealthily. then after that, we uhh, go to kansas? (he he, very nice) after we get to kansas we will realize that there are already certain objectives that have already been already completed... already! at which point the elves should have already arrived with the punch, so we’ll get the dants to come up and monitor that while we slip out into the approaching darkness, ride bikes, hop on pop, and make the required pyrotarded mystakes. then, after all has been forgived, one of two things will happen, we will either get a movie, or we will not, and then we shall make the diablisticizions late into the somnambulance...

letters to pedro...

Hi Peter, How are you doing. I think of you often, but decided to send a quick note. It was a busy day at Waldorf I am sure you mom told you about the inauguration, dedication of Library , play and it was a beautiful day so all got to transpire on time in the right place without having to rum for shelter. to keep warm that was another story the sun was out, but if you were in the shade it was cool.
I think I see your friend Tyler around town. sometimes sitting on one of the benches uptown . Is he going to Waldorf? He, if it is him, looks sort of lonelyl Is he ok??? I hope so. I know he has had a time with school so hope all is well.
Welll I have rambled enough// Good night, God Bless Love
Gra'ma H.

Okay, so i didn't preface that at all, but that's the point of this blog anyway right? You fuckers already know what's what.

That's not a fair test, that joke's hi-larious...

Haha...I spent the night hanging out with all three of your guys' sisters! It was...actually, I lot of fun...we spent most of the night reminiscing about you two and now I miss you both...you bastards...

Oh, yeah, and at the risk of sounding like a racist/opportunist...I am so totally dating a twenty-five year old black girl...how studly is that? She's absolutely delightful in so many ways...though, I don't look forward to the day that we discuss religion...

And I've made an effort to cut off all ties from My Meteoric Rise to Mediocrity and Eating Out With Us to this blog...purely so I never have to think "Should I be writing this? What if (Insert Name of Highschooler Here) ever stumbles across it?"...but, alas, a connection made is hard to break...fucking Google...and Technorati...though, the connections are VERY hard to find...

Does CSOI do house calls?

The house has been great, but something just wasn't right. It hasn't quite been "home" this whole month + and I couldn't put my finger on it until tonight. The problem was that we hadn't done severe, ridonkulous damage to it yet. I feel more comfy already. Tonight during a quick round of Mattress (the game which consisits of grasping an air mattress, holding it in front of you, and running screaming across the house directly into a person) I was hurled completely through our wall like a bowling ball through a giant graham cracker. It looks likes Wile Coyote took a detour through our hallway and that sneaky Roadrunner did some real quick-like dry-walling to trip him up. It's all good though, because Chris and Josh are going to pay their boss some drugs to patch it up. Good fun. Man, when I stop breaking shit on a semi-regular basis, it's all over. Put me to fucking sleep. What's the point?

Call it fate, call it luck, call it karma...

So, here's some right fucked up news, presented with the hopes that it will catalyze activity hereabouts... Sure, it's a cop-out in terms of its "reality tv" nature, but it's pertinent triumvirate business.

A Conversation Between Me and the Carpenter:


keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:53:35 PM)
   what's new

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (8:54:18 PM)
   oh, not too much... i'm back at school... i'm going to chile over winter break...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:54:35 PM)
   cool

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (8:54:36 PM)
   ireland is a swell place to visit...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:54:52 PM)
   yeah, kayla wants to go there sometime

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (8:55:29 PM)
   well, if you were thinking of visiting county ciarrai, i could tell you all about it...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:56:21 PM)
   you never made it down here

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (8:57:33 PM)
   i know, i was really bummed about it, but we ended up just running out of free weekends...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:57:58 PM)
   yeah, i had a pretty crazy summer

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:58:15 PM)
   lots of weddings, including brad's

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (8:58:50 PM)
   cool, cool... how's married life treating bradley?

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:59:05 PM)
   so far so good

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (8:59:16 PM)
   from what i can tell anyways

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:00:06 PM)
   that's good to hear...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:00:18 PM)
   yeah

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:00:46 PM)
   so, are you still carpentering away?

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:00:58 PM)
   you bet

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:01:37 PM)
   well, actually right now we are doing a lot of concrete work while they're finding another place for me and another guy to go

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:02:05 PM)
   two carpenters working with a bunch of concrete guys isn't a good mix

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:02:21 PM)
   i suppose not...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:02:47 PM)
   you still seeing that one girl you mentioned to me a while back

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:03:48 PM)
   sure am... i'm going to chile with her...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:03:54 PM)
   ok

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:04:04 PM)
   good for you

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:04:14 PM)
   i'll have to meet her sometime

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:05:25 PM)
   i agree, i'm sure you'd think she was "my type"... though i don't think i can explain why...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:05:52 PM)
   well, that gives me kind of an idea

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:07:08 PM)
   ha ha... good, good...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:08:14 PM)
   yeah, i justs spent more money than i have on kayla

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:08:52 PM)
   how'd you manage that?

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:09:03 PM)
   rings cost a lot

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:09:09 PM)
   yowzas!

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:09:15 PM)
   more than a carpenter makes

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:09:34 PM)
   well, besides jesus... 

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:09:43 PM)
   right right

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:09:47 PM)
   of course

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:11:08 PM)
   so, is this like a very important ring ryan? are you telling me that my boyhood chum is hitchin' up his wagon to one of the gendered others and driving off into the marital sunset?

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:11:42 PM)
   yeah, i would say that you pretty well pinpointed it

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:12:02 PM)
   WOOT! that's some crazy shit man, but congrats for sure...!

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:12:14 PM)
   thanks

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:13:03 PM)
   now you need to just hurry up

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:13:31 PM)
   ha ha... umm yeah, fuck that... at least for several more years...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:13:43 PM)
   i suppose

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:14:11 PM)
   kayla and i have been together for four years and she was pushing for it being it is her senior year

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:14:36 PM)
   so i gave in and now all the decisions can be made by her

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:15:01 PM)
   ha ha... atta boy... i'm really stoked for you man...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:15:31 PM)
   well, thank, i appreciate it

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:15:47 PM)
   you'll have to let the other guys know, i can never seem to get ahold of em

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:16:14 PM)
   i can and will do that... of course... so, like, is there a date?

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:16:29 PM)
   no, not as of yet

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:16:38 PM)
   i guess more importantly, are we invited?

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:16:40 PM)
   maybe a year from now or so

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:16:51 PM)
   damn right you're envited

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:17:46 PM)
   alright, all i can say to that is drop me a line as soon as you know and i'll do my damnedest to be there...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:18:04 PM)
   cool, thanks man

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:18:25 PM)
   it just wouldn't be right without the crew there

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:19:15 PM)
   fer sher... i mean joel & brent are essential to provide the baseline laughter at any event...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:19:27 PM)
   that's right

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:19:41 PM)
   and eric is getting progressively wierder looking... so that's awesome...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:19:48 PM)
   great

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:20:04 PM)
   wierdness is always good

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:20:26 PM)
   especially when it comes from that strange little fellow...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:20:46 PM)
   yep, man i haven't seen any of you for way too long

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:21:16 PM)
   it's a sad state of affairs...

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:21:21 PM)
   that it is

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:22:10 PM)
   well bud, it is going to be one hell of a long day pouring crete tomorrow so i should probably head off

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:22:30 PM)
   keep in touch man, it's been to long

Santiago, Jan 1-19... says: (9:23:36 PM)
   indeed, i'll talk to you again soon, have a good night and congrats again!

keep track of your fingers while swinging a hammer!!! 515-460-2682 says: (9:24:35 PM)
   i will talk to you laters